Blog entry for:
Fri, Feb 18, 2005 06:21:22 AM
∞ a partnership? with GOD?? ∞
posted: Fri, Feb 18, 2005 06:21:22 AM
now i know where i got this idea last year when i was sharing stuff with my new sponsor, I HAD READ IT IN THE JFT BOOK! i doubt that i have many original ideas concerning recovery, and now i know for sure that i am an ordinary, garden variety addict, and that is cool!
so after reading and sitting around meditating after reading this, this morning, i have come to the conclusion that this is how it always was and probably will be! truthfully, before accepting this path i was a crappy partner. i did not take direction, exercised my selfish, self-centered self-will to the detriment of those around me and to society at large, and failed to honor my part of the this partnership contract. the amazing thing is that i was not X'd from this relationship which speaks to infinite patience, even though i did everything to bolster my belief that there was nothing outside of the physical realm, and certainly not a guiding, patient, loving HIGHER POWER. i have walked away from those beliefs and today understand that my part in this relationship is to do my best to honor this partnership and live up to my obligations, which of course change as i do.
what exactly does that look like today? that is revealed on a need to know basis, however i do know that i NEED to stay clean today and am provided with any and all tools required to do so, i also know that i was rescued from the depths of my active addiction for some reason, what that reason is, is irrelevant today as long as i remain open to hearing what my job is today. and you know, as a human and an addict, uncertainty can create FEAR and DOUBT, but again that goes back to my part in the partnership, KEEPING THE FAITH that i will not only be apprised of what i need to do today, i will be given anything and everything i need to accomplish that task. so this amazing journey continues and even though i feel tired, and unneeded today, i know that these feelings like all others will pass, all i have to do is feel them and live the program the best i can today!
&infin DT∞
so after reading and sitting around meditating after reading this, this morning, i have come to the conclusion that this is how it always was and probably will be! truthfully, before accepting this path i was a crappy partner. i did not take direction, exercised my selfish, self-centered self-will to the detriment of those around me and to society at large, and failed to honor my part of the this partnership contract. the amazing thing is that i was not X'd from this relationship which speaks to infinite patience, even though i did everything to bolster my belief that there was nothing outside of the physical realm, and certainly not a guiding, patient, loving HIGHER POWER. i have walked away from those beliefs and today understand that my part in this relationship is to do my best to honor this partnership and live up to my obligations, which of course change as i do.
what exactly does that look like today? that is revealed on a need to know basis, however i do know that i NEED to stay clean today and am provided with any and all tools required to do so, i also know that i was rescued from the depths of my active addiction for some reason, what that reason is, is irrelevant today as long as i remain open to hearing what my job is today. and you know, as a human and an addict, uncertainty can create FEAR and DOUBT, but again that goes back to my part in the partnership, KEEPING THE FAITH that i will not only be apprised of what i need to do today, i will be given anything and everything i need to accomplish that task. so this amazing journey continues and even though i feel tired, and unneeded today, i know that these feelings like all others will pass, all i have to do is feel them and live the program the best i can today!
&infin DT∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
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☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 2
2) He diminishes it and again diminishes it, till he arrives at doing
nothing (on purpose). Having arrived at this point of non-action,
there is nothing which he does not do.