Blog entry for:

Sun, Apr 30, 2006 08:29:06 AM


∞ unwilling to make the decisions i know i must make to move forward ∞
posted: Sun, Apr 30, 2006 08:29:06 AM

 

well, i have had the first practical application of this reading in my life lately, in fact i am at the end of my second month after GOD made a decision for me and doing quite well. the irony of this is not lost on me at all, as the set of steps i am currently stalled on is about decision-making.
truthfully i am uncomfortable with choice. i may scream at the top of my lungs when i am forced to do something or i feel a decision is crammed down my throat, but the reality is that i am much more comfortable when someone or something else makes a decision for me. and that simple statement is the crux of what keeps me from moving forward under my own steam. i like to have someone to blame if the decision i had made for me goes awry, then i can move forward in a reactive manner, nursing a resentment, feeding my self-pity and providing more evidence that this whole recovery gig does not work.
so, you may ask what decision has been made for me lately? well GOD gave me the boot out the door of a job that i had worked at for nearly twelve years. i really was not happy there and felt dissatisfied and unchallenged by the tasks i was paid to perform. and yet i hung on, unwilling to look for a new direction in my career after completing my degree. i just was so comfortable that i clung to my old job with tenacity and ferocity, whining about how bored i was to anyone who cared to listen. now i am working for myself and learning how to deal with the challenges that face me in that prospect -- time management, taking on too many tasks, and trying to make a buck while maintaining my recovery. and you know what, i may whine and moan about being thrust forward into this new method of providing my daily bread, but i am happier and more satisfies than i have been for quite a while and that is worth the momentary feeling of discomfort i felt all those sixty or so days ago. GOD did for me what i was unwilling or unable to do for myself and i am more than satisfied with the results! how about that! anyway off to the airport for a return to my new life and to catch-up with all the projects languishing on my desk, that were abandoned for service. life is good this morning!

∞ DT ∞

 

djtConsulting Brand
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.

Another Look!

↔ doing for me ↔ 248 words ➥ Saturday, April 30, 2005 by: donnot
∞ i sometimes allow myself to become stuck in the problem ∞ 562 words ➥ Monday, April 30, 2007 by: donnot
δ sometimes what occurs in my life can be frightening, as change often seems.  δ 219 words ➥ Wednesday, April 30, 2008 by: donnot
↔ at times i may get stuck in my recovery … 532 words ➥ Thursday, April 30, 2009 by: donnot
∞ my ongoing recovery is dependent on my relationship with a loving God ∞ 984 words ➥ Saturday, April 30, 2011 by: donnot
λ moving forward with FAITH, i can see that the strength of a Higher Power λ 760 words ➥ Monday, April 30, 2012 by: donnot
ε i trust that the POWER that fuels my recovery ε 776 words ➥ Tuesday, April 30, 2013 by: donnot
¥ through the grace of the POWER that fuels my recovery, ¥ 591 words ➥ Wednesday, April 30, 2014 by: donnot
♥ do for me what i ♥ 679 words ➥ Thursday, April 30, 2015 by: donnot
⤞ what i find ⤝ 800 words ➥ Saturday, April 30, 2016 by: donnot
⇘ GOD does ⇗ 714 words ➥ Sunday, April 30, 2017 by: donnot
🏚 getting stuck 🗱 784 words ➥ Monday, April 30, 2018 by: donnot
🌋 what occurs 🌈 561 words ➥ Tuesday, April 30, 2019 by: donnot
💥 unexpected change 💥 555 words ➥ Thursday, April 30, 2020 by: donnot
🙇 unable, afraid, 🙏 467 words ➥ Friday, April 30, 2021 by: donnot
🚶 moving forward 🏃 397 words ➥ Saturday, April 30, 2022 by: donnot
🚣 the value 🚶 452 words ➥ Sunday, April 30, 2023 by: donnot
🎭 i am no longer 🎬 610 words ➥ Tuesday, April 30, 2024 by: donnot
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☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯

THE TAO TEH KING, OR THE TAO AND ITS CHARACTERISTICS
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge

Book 1

2) The course and nature of things is such that
What was in front is now behind;
What warmed anon we freezing find.
Strength is of weakness oft the spoil;
The store in ruins mocks our toil. Hence the sage puts away excessive
effort, extravagance, and easy indulgence.