โ when i remember why i came to the fellowship and in what condition i arrived, โ
Posted: Tue, Jul 31, 2007 09:43:30 AM
i realize that material wealth pales in comparison to the spiritual riches i have gained in recovery.
this morning, what struck me was the simplicity of the promise that has come true for me. when i am tempted to compare my life with the appearance of other members, all i need to come back to what i was promised when i got here, the FREEDOM from active addiction, nothing more and nothing less. although i have had some material success and do not get me wrong, i am grateful for the material gifts i have been given, and i am not quite ready to give all of those gifts back and live a life of an ascetic. that being said, i am also grateful for the spiritual gifts i have received. gifts like the ability to be honest, loving, caring, empathetic, and trustworthy. that list is hardly inclusive, and those gifts i have received that were not listed are not any less important, they just do not pop out of my mind at this moment.
so what i guess this reading brings up is yet another gift, the ability to be grateful for everything i have today. so the next question that pops into my mind is that could i be happy if i lost all the material gifts that i have received? that is a reservation that i have looked at in the past, and it is one that i need to check in on, on a periodic basis. today i can say yes i would be able to stay clean, and after a bit of whining and moaning, i could be happy also.
so exactly what does freedom from active addiction mean to me today, at this point in my recovery? well it means that i do not have the obsession to use this morning. i have a choice whether or not i will use today. it means that if i am frustrated or unhappy with things not going my way, i can start my day over again and let go. it means i can learn to accept myself as i am today. and it means that i can take time out of my day to write this little missive to the cyberworld. so time to start back to work and meet my responsibilities.
this morning, what struck me was the simplicity of the promise that has come true for me. when i am tempted to compare my life with the appearance of other members, all i need to come back to what i was promised when i got here, the FREEDOM from active addiction, nothing more and nothing less. although i have had some material success and do not get me wrong, i am grateful for the material gifts i have been given, and i am not quite ready to give all of those gifts back and live a life of an ascetic. that being said, i am also grateful for the spiritual gifts i have received. gifts like the ability to be honest, loving, caring, empathetic, and trustworthy. that list is hardly inclusive, and those gifts i have received that were not listed are not any less important, they just do not pop out of my mind at this moment.
so what i guess this reading brings up is yet another gift, the ability to be grateful for everything i have today. so the next question that pops into my mind is that could i be happy if i lost all the material gifts that i have received? that is a reservation that i have looked at in the past, and it is one that i need to check in on, on a periodic basis. today i can say yes i would be able to stay clean, and after a bit of whining and moaning, i could be happy also.
so exactly what does freedom from active addiction mean to me today, at this point in my recovery? well it means that i do not have the obsession to use this morning. i have a choice whether or not i will use today. it means that if i am frustrated or unhappy with things not going my way, i can start my day over again and let go. it means i can learn to accept myself as i am today. and it means that i can take time out of my day to write this little missive to the cyberworld. so time to start back to work and meet my responsibilities.
∞ DT ∞