Blog entry for:

i come to value it all the more! right off the bat: I HATE CAR ANALOGIES. there now that is out of the way, i can move forward into what i heard this morning.
recovery is a gift, that i can choose to keep or give away. the paradox is that IF i want to keep it, i have to give it away. sometimes i wonder if the gift that i am giving has any value to anyone but me? when i get to that place, i have to stop and take a brief inventory, as there is something going on inside of me, that makes me feel like i have a worthless gift to give. there is more than enough evidence, that at its bare minimum, the power to stay clean today, i have a gift that is worth giving, to anyone who is like me: an ordinary, garden variety addict. what is usually going on, as has been the case lately, is that in the process of living my recovery, i am being worked to death by the step i happen to be working on myself. getting entirely ready, always seemed so easy in the past, and yet as with all the other steps in this particular cycle, this step is just eating my lunch and enjoying the fVck out of it.
so what is an addict to do? well this addict is going to get up, hit the shower, do some work, attend my home group, meet with a sponsee, do some more work, chillax. cook dinner and just be present for whatever else happens to come down the pike today.
is my gift worth giving? YES!
is the gift of recovery worth doing whatever it takes to maintain it? YES!
is today getting any shorted? YES!
what is the terminal velocity of a swallow in flight?…
until next time, be well and be good to yourself, i know i will be, good to myself that is.

∞ DT ∞