Blog entry for:
Tue, Mar 5, 2013 09:27:11 AM
℘ i always seem to, at first, look for ways to exert power against admitting i am powerless. ℘
posted: Tue, Mar 5, 2013 09:27:11 AM
after exhausting these ways, i begin sharing with others and find hope. okay, so i wrote this on the bus, and technology failed. what a rude awakening! anyhow, as i was walking from the bus station to work, i has a flash of what i really needed to write about, and it certainly was not about the feelings i had about how to get to work today. no what is going on, is i am feeling judgmental and before i puke all over someone, i guess i need to use this forum as a place to sort through them.
even though i have a fire to deal with, i will work through right here and right now. i do believe that peddling substances to those who are weak or new in their recovery program IS WORSE than stealing from other members. i can go through my reasons, but in the end, the truth is that i have to confront my feelings, and realize that like addiction, other addicts and their addiction, i am powerless over them.
the question then becomes, can i put aside my judgements and give away my recovery to someone i have very little respect left for? well that question will be answered or not as this day goes on. what i need to do today is call my addict, fix a few fires and be at peace, that as powerless as i am over my feelings, i can allow myself the ability to let the POWER that fuels my recovery give me what i need to move forward and become more than i was yesterday.
even though i have a fire to deal with, i will work through right here and right now. i do believe that peddling substances to those who are weak or new in their recovery program IS WORSE than stealing from other members. i can go through my reasons, but in the end, the truth is that i have to confront my feelings, and realize that like addiction, other addicts and their addiction, i am powerless over them.
the question then becomes, can i put aside my judgements and give away my recovery to someone i have very little respect left for? well that question will be answered or not as this day goes on. what i need to do today is call my addict, fix a few fires and be at peace, that as powerless as i am over my feelings, i can allow myself the ability to let the POWER that fuels my recovery give me what i need to move forward and become more than i was yesterday.
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
∞ rude awakenings ↔ spiritual awakenings ∞ 416 words ➥ Saturday, March 5, 2005 by: donnotα recognizing the value of rude awakenings α 488 words ➥ Sunday, March 5, 2006 by: donnot
∞ such awakenings often disclose barriers that block me from making spiritual progress in my recovery. ∞ 381 words ➥ Monday, March 5, 2007 by: donnot
∞ i hate to have my covers pulled; i do not like being laid naked in full view. … 379 words ➥ Wednesday, March 5, 2008 by: donnot
∞ rude awakenings in recovery? such an awakening might occur when some undesirable bit of my behavior is … 335 words ➥ Thursday, March 5, 2009 by: donnot
¥ no victims here, only volunteers -- i do not like being laid naked in full view ¥ 381 words ➥ Friday, March 5, 2010 by: donnot
∃ when a need arises for me to admit my powerlessness ∃ 654 words ➥ Saturday, March 5, 2011 by: donnot
∝ just like everyone else, i HAVE to work the steps ∝ 479 words ➥ Monday, March 5, 2012 by: donnot
þ i will recognize the rude awakenings i have þ 772 words ➥ Wednesday, March 5, 2014 by: donnot
≈ from rude awakening ≈ 663 words ➥ Thursday, March 5, 2015 by: donnot
☎ just like everyone else, ☎ 706 words ➥ Saturday, March 5, 2016 by: donnot
✫ barriers that may block ✬ 580 words ➥ Sunday, March 5, 2017 by: donnot
😬 looking for ways 🙃 572 words ➥ Monday, March 5, 2018 by: donnot
🌬 healing and serenity 🌫 436 words ➥ Tuesday, March 5, 2019 by: donnot
😭 being laid 😳 505 words ➥ Thursday, March 5, 2020 by: donnot
🚧 the barriers 🚧 412 words ➥ Friday, March 5, 2021 by: donnot
😠 opportunities to grow 😲 539 words ➥ Saturday, March 5, 2022 by: donnot
🌫 i realize 🌫 580 words ➥ Sunday, March 5, 2023 by: donnot
😵 getting okay 🤔 494 words ➥ Tuesday, March 5, 2024 by: donnot
☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 2
3) He who acts (with an ulterior purpose) does harm; he who takes
hold of a thing (in the same way) loses his hold. The sage does not
act (so), and therefore does no harm; he does not lay hold (so), and
therefore does not lose his bold. (But) people in their conduct of
affairs are constantly ruining them when they are on the eve of success.
If they were careful at the end, as (they should be) at the beginning,
they would not so ruin them.