Blog entry for:

most clearly by how it feels, not by **signs** or words and it just feels right.
over the course of my recovery, i never was a firm believer in signs, signals, thunderbolts or burning bushes. in fact i used to scoff at those who did as being ignorant. today i am not writing about the **signs** i see in my life, but rather about how i grew to respect those who do look for **signs** and how i moved away from even considering them as relevant to my life in the here and now.
as one may remember, i am not any sort of “GOD” guy and my path to FAITH has been long, winding and arduous. one thing that never struck me as something i needed to grab on to, was the notion that the POWER that fuels my recovery, tells me what my next best move should be, through **signs**. something that i DID grab on to, and hang on to dearly today, is that POWER, communicates with me through the words and deeds of my peers, friends and those who happen to the fortune to run into me, across the course of my daily travails. in a sense, i guess that could be considered a subset of the whole **signs** paradigm. namely that if i pay attention to my fellows travelers as i encounter and interact with them, i will have all the clues i need to do the next right thing. the difference, at least in my head, and it may just be a semantic game i play to salve my own conscience, is that paying attention to and acting on new information, is not the same as looking for the answers, through the various events in my life. for me, paying attention is more of a passive act, as i learn to be more present in my life, and it just happens auto-magically, so i need not make a conscious effort to seek and interpret what happens through the **signs** filter. those of my friends, acquaintances and peers who do? well for them, i have come to have respect. just as i am following my spiritual path, with very little or no interference from them, so i need to allow them to do the same, and derision and disrespect is not allowing them to be who they are. i need to remember, that once upon a time i felt and believed in a very similar manner, and no one, after i made the switch to the fellowship that has become my life, has ever told me i NEED to stop traveling the spiritual road that has been revealed before me. when i heard the coyotes howling at the rising full moon last night, i was struck by a certainty, that regardless of what happened last night, i was exactly where i needed to be. i did not take their chorus as a sign that the coyote may be my spirit guide, or as a sign of evil and ominous times ahead. no i took it for what it was, a natural event that i was fortunate to have been a part of. they would have howled regardless of whether or not i was there, so i was the lucky one. anyhow the **signs** say it is time to hop into the shower and get rolling on down the road top work. maybe, just maybe i will uncover what today is going to bring, or just be awake for it and allow it to happen.

∞ DT ∞