Blog entry for:

mercy, not justice.
after a whirlwind weekend for what was a destination weekend, i am home today, taking care of my chores. just had breakfast with the boyz and hammered another friend about doing what they agreed to, i am ready to chill for a moment before i start chipping away at what i have to do. yews, i was a a richard cranium about that, however, i have fou8nd, that id\\f someone does not hold me to my word, i can always find a rationalization or justification, for not doing something, at least when i am less than stellar spiritually. so i hate to say, “ticktock, bro your time has elapsed,” but sometimes it has to be done, especially when i made an exception to the rules.
yes, i was one of the loudest screamers when it came to saying how unfair everything was, and that attitude, is long in passing. what i wanted when i got here, is way different than what i got, and when i hear friends who are in and out, whining about how tough life is, my first response, at least in my head, is so what, you brought it down upon yourself. what i say, when i remember that i , too, was around but never in the program, and things were all fVcked up, is what was said to me: “what do you want to do about it?”
yes, i did no9t get justice when i got here, it was justice that put me here, and man, oh man did i whine about how unfair and tough it was, being me. i, however, got mercy in abundance, and even the final straw was a merciful landing instead of what could have been the just ending, as i could not and would not comply with the conditions upon my life, even though i totally agreed to them. life in the accountable world is tough, for someone like me, after all i want all the benefits but do not want to do any of the work. that attitude has cost me more than i care to enumerate, but i also know that attitude is playing less and less of a role in my active thinking.
anyhow, today i am grateful for the mercy i got and continue to get, as a result of joining the No Matter What club. today, i will enjoy the benfit of having a paid day off, getting stuff done and still having enough time, to do absolutely nothing. it is a great day to be clean.

∞ DT ∞