๐ practicing ๐
Posted: Wed, May 17, 2023 07:01:13 AM
the principle of love for the sake of unity. the topic i pulled out of the mess i was presented with this morning, was that i need to allow my love of the fellowship and my peers to overrule my tendencies to be cynical, judgemental and self-righteous. most of the time i can use the title of my source material as the seed for this exercise, today, however,is not one of those days. the title was clunky and actually did very little to summarize what the material was all about. after a bit of frustration about what i expected to read and what i actually read, i found a “sweet spot” in which i could dwell.
for this addict, looking past what i see as trespasses against myself and those i love, is not always the easiest task to accomplish, no matter how “spiritual” i feel in any particular moment. i am pretty sure that is a human trait that most, if not all members of this species save, save for the few true saints that walk amongst us. i am also well aware that the part of me that is addiction, takes the worst traits, human or not, and magnifies them into something more destructive, cruel and heinous. i am grateful i have a program of active recovery to ameliorate and combat the effect addiction has on my life. even though i am clean and have been for a minute, does not mean i am “recovered.” more power to those who walk through recovery and get to “graduate,” i can unconditionally say i am not one of those and have accepted that i will need to live a program of recovery for at least another day. part of walking through this day, in recovery, is to acknowledge the places where i have a bit of power in my life and change what i can. i may not be able to free the minds of those that are caught up in the cult of racist, misogynistic FEAR from their “masters” but i can apply the principle of love to all i encounter today, by being kind, even if i feel like punching some a$$wipe in the face. i am not better than they are, even though i am able to look at the world and think for myself, in these uncertain times. just for today? well, just for today, i will remember that i can practice love in all situations and do my best to do just that.
for this addict, looking past what i see as trespasses against myself and those i love, is not always the easiest task to accomplish, no matter how “spiritual” i feel in any particular moment. i am pretty sure that is a human trait that most, if not all members of this species save, save for the few true saints that walk amongst us. i am also well aware that the part of me that is addiction, takes the worst traits, human or not, and magnifies them into something more destructive, cruel and heinous. i am grateful i have a program of active recovery to ameliorate and combat the effect addiction has on my life. even though i am clean and have been for a minute, does not mean i am “recovered.” more power to those who walk through recovery and get to “graduate,” i can unconditionally say i am not one of those and have accepted that i will need to live a program of recovery for at least another day. part of walking through this day, in recovery, is to acknowledge the places where i have a bit of power in my life and change what i can. i may not be able to free the minds of those that are caught up in the cult of racist, misogynistic FEAR from their “masters” but i can apply the principle of love to all i encounter today, by being kind, even if i feel like punching some a$$wipe in the face. i am not better than they are, even though i am able to look at the world and think for myself, in these uncertain times. just for today? well, just for today, i will remember that i can practice love in all situations and do my best to do just that.
∞ DT ∞