๐ an addict, ๐
Posted: Tue, Jun 3, 2025 07:20:17 AM
any addict can stop using drugs, lose the desire to use, and find a new way to live!
in a time that seems long, long ago, in a world that feels far, far away from the one i live in today, i was not sure what i was or where, if anywhere i belonged. as a result, i attended meetings in more than one twelve step fellowship, which did little to clarify my direction. one had all sorts of promises and the members there often shared about how they were being fulfilled. to say the least, i did not “get” what they were talking about, as my life was still totally unmanageable. the other fellowship, offered a single promise, simple and direct. i often thought that if i ended there, by some stretch of the imagination, i was ripping myself off. in the long run, when i found i could not keep bopping between two different fellowships, i felt that one promise was all i needed and landed in the fellowship that sustains my recovery today. that was, IMHO, the best decision i ever made.
this morning, as i was deciding what to use as my source material, i was struck by the notion that no matter what happens i have the ways and means to foster my recovery, by remember where i was in those dark days of mere abstinence and where i am this morning. even though i am looking at unemployment and the uncertainty of what is happening in my prostate, i know i am better off that i was way back when and i can walk through this adversity with my head held high and the FAITH that i will be okay.
oddly enough, that message, still rings true today for me. amazingly, i made it through traffic and arrived at the office intact, sane and mostly serene. there is a little FEAR about my uncertain future, but i will not allow it to consume me, as i have a POWER that fuels my recovery, that may provide me the answers to all my worries, if i pay attention and let IT do ITs thing. just for today, i will allow myself to revel in my FREEDOM from active addiction and see what i can find to do at work.
in a time that seems long, long ago, in a world that feels far, far away from the one i live in today, i was not sure what i was or where, if anywhere i belonged. as a result, i attended meetings in more than one twelve step fellowship, which did little to clarify my direction. one had all sorts of promises and the members there often shared about how they were being fulfilled. to say the least, i did not “get” what they were talking about, as my life was still totally unmanageable. the other fellowship, offered a single promise, simple and direct. i often thought that if i ended there, by some stretch of the imagination, i was ripping myself off. in the long run, when i found i could not keep bopping between two different fellowships, i felt that one promise was all i needed and landed in the fellowship that sustains my recovery today. that was, IMHO, the best decision i ever made.
this morning, as i was deciding what to use as my source material, i was struck by the notion that no matter what happens i have the ways and means to foster my recovery, by remember where i was in those dark days of mere abstinence and where i am this morning. even though i am looking at unemployment and the uncertainty of what is happening in my prostate, i know i am better off that i was way back when and i can walk through this adversity with my head held high and the FAITH that i will be okay.
oddly enough, that message, still rings true today for me. amazingly, i made it through traffic and arrived at the office intact, sane and mostly serene. there is a little FEAR about my uncertain future, but i will not allow it to consume me, as i have a POWER that fuels my recovery, that may provide me the answers to all my worries, if i pay attention and let IT do ITs thing. just for today, i will allow myself to revel in my FREEDOM from active addiction and see what i can find to do at work.
∞ DT ∞