Some memes

gain in the areas of sex, property and social position, which brought so much pain in the past, falls by the wayside if i adhere to the principle of anonymity. once again for the third time this year, i had to dive into a different piece of fellowship literature to uncover a topic that suited me this morning. it is not as if i have never written about anonymity and how in the rooms of the fellowship it can be the great equalizer and when i practice it, it is nearly impossible to place personalities, mine especially, over principles. what struck me the most, as i started off in the paragraph that i used as my lead, was living a life in active anonymity.
admitting here this morning on day five of six, i need to figure out how i am going to be okay at work, get a card and flowers for my spouse for our anniversary and feed myself at work tonight and tomorrow night. more will be revealed a is bounce into action,. as i am certainly way overthinking what is ahead of me, just as i told my sponsee to stop doing. i have time and i have the motivation to take care of my bidness, before and after work, i just need to let myself flow into this day and see what i may bring, after all my laundry is done, my workout is done and this exercise is getting done. instead of freaking out about how little time i have left before work, i am leaning into just taking a breath and moving forward.
so the part of anonymity i always forget is that when i enter the rooms, i can leave my social status, bank balance, job status, marital status and employment status behind. unless any or all of those are affecting my recovery, i need not even mention them. when i am with my peers in recovery, i am their equal, no matter how much clean time i may have. i am an equal member of our community and i should not expect my voice to carry any more weight than the voices of anyone else. at times, i may desire it to be the most “correct,” especially when it comes to carrying the message to the still suffering addict. when i run that desire through the filter of anonymity, it quickly loses its ability to drive me onto places that i need not go. for me, desire seems to be the biggest bugaboo in my life. right now and right here, i have the desire to get some stuff done before i have to go to work, and i think that desire is not a bad thing. just for today, i will do my me=y best to apply the principle of anonymity to all areas of my life, remembering that i am no better or no worse than those around me.

∞ DT ∞