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if i want to be free of those defects, i must uncover them and not discover them.
the reading is an excellent one for me today, not that i have any secrets i am currently carrying, that i am keeping from my sponsor. far from it, i just finished the best fifth step i ever did. i can actually sat that about every singles fifth step i have done, each has been the best fifth step i had done to date, due to the nature of this program which has given me this shiny and brand new life. of course now i sound like some kind of shill for recovery, but that is not my issue -- CALL YOUR SPONSOR!
so as i was saying before i was so rudely interrupted by my ever diverting mind, i am in the space between my fifth and sixth steps, and although all my secrets as have been revealed to me, have been shared with my sponsor, and i have worked two sixth steps, i am certain that i have character defects and secrets that lie in the murky darkness of my ever forgetting brain. those little pieces of my past and current life may be unknown to me at this time, BUT they are not waiting to be discovered, they have already been revealed at least once, no they are waiting to be uncovered. the difference is previous knowledge, one might say that Columbus discovered the island of Hispaniola, and it would not be quite untrue based on common set of naive beliefs that compromised the history lessons of my youth. however it is more likely that Columbus was acting on a tradition passed orally down from the Celts and the Norse and to the inhabitants of that island, the fact their home was discovered would be quite a shock, after all they knew it was there all the time. so a more accurate manner of describing the journey of Columbus is that he and his crew returned to Europe with the knowledge of new lands, they uncovered this new piece of geography and added it into the knowledge of the time.
just like Hispaniola there are secrets and defects that i have yet to uncover and add to the knowledge of myself, and when i happen to trip across them, i NEED to do as the reading suggests, share them with someone i trust. my sponsor, my closed-mouthed friends or the woman i love. i also have first hand experience what happens to this addict when he chooses to be secretive and keep his real self hidden from those who love him, he becomes even sicker and starts the process of separating himself from the fellowship that has given him a manner of living that is beyond his wildweest dreams. and that process will not start today!

∞ DT ∞