Blog entry for:

the meetings; are the gathering places where newcomers are first welcomed and can see that, yes, we are having fun now. okay, well maybe i do take myself far too seriously, far too much of the time, i can accept that and even laugh about it, when it come down to it. sure, addiction is a fatal and chronic malady, and yes i need to do whatever it takes to stay clean today -- BUT that does not mean being grim and scared about every little puff of wind life may send my way. of course, i was far too serious before i started recovery, in fact even before i started using i was far too serious, so i can accept that is probably part of my nature and when i look at it in that manner i can even laugh at that. it really is quite absurd how dark and serious i have been all my life, and the wonderful thing is that as i continue this journey through recovery, i can learn how to become something i never was before, and the sort of person i always wanted to be. you know, easy going, self-assured, worry free and confident in his ability to use the tools at his disposal to handle the slings and arrows of life on its own terms.
back to the reading, as i have wandered a bit off track here. anyhow, so the real upshot is what is that i present to a newcomer when they walk into the room. am i welcoming even though they do not appear to want to be welcomed? or do i use that as an excuse to "give them the space they need" so i can go on enjoying the company of my friends and associates. do i present a stark and harsh view of life in recovery or even worse a sunshine and roses view or perhaps when i am balanced i share about the mix of good and bad that recovery has brought into my life? and most importantly of all, do i show myself to be the fallible, human that i have come to know, or do i hide behind the shell of my arrogance so i do not have to deal with them?
so quite a bit to digest as i head off to the showers and into my day in the life, and yes i am glad and grateful that bi am the absurd person i am today, after all, who else could i be?

∞ DT ∞