Blog entry for:
Sun, Feb 21, 2021 10:09:47 AM
🌫 my choice 🌫
posted: Sun, Feb 21, 2021 10:09:47 AM
lately, has been to dwell in the house of pain, courtesy of a huge dose of self-pity. everything sucks, i suck and i do not see any hope for the future sucking any less, is a constant refrain. and yet, i stay clean, work an active program of recovery and muddle through these dark and dank days, the best that i can. although it seems less than obvious that one might be able to live in a prison of self-pity and active recovery at the same time, that has been my life lately. over and over and over again, i fall into a pattern of being a victim of my choices and over and over and over again, i accept that i am doing the next right thing and i did CHOOSE to do this or that and i do NOT have to do that, right now.
this morning, as i rush to accomplish everything i believe i NEED to do, i am that alternating state of reality. pissed off because i did not get up early enough to get done before having to meet an obligation and grateful that i have got most of what i wanted to do, done. i sat, ate breakfast, did my laundry and got 4 and half miles under my belt and it is only ten o'clock.
anyhow, i have to run on to my next choice. it is a good day to be clean and choose to move out of the house of pain i have constructed for myself and see how the other half lives, just for today.
this morning, as i rush to accomplish everything i believe i NEED to do, i am that alternating state of reality. pissed off because i did not get up early enough to get done before having to meet an obligation and grateful that i have got most of what i wanted to do, done. i sat, ate breakfast, did my laundry and got 4 and half miles under my belt and it is only ten o'clock.
anyhow, i have to run on to my next choice. it is a good day to be clean and choose to move out of the house of pain i have constructed for myself and see how the other half lives, just for today.
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
∞ self-pity and recovery ∞ 255 words ➥ Monday, February 21, 2005 by: donnot∞ replacing self-pity with gratitude ∞ 469 words ➥ Tuesday, February 21, 2006 by: donnot
∞ self-pity is a tool of our disease; ∞ 444 words ➥ Wednesday, February 21, 2007 by: donnot
μ as long as i could feel sorry for myself and blame someone else for my troubles, μ 485 words ➥ Thursday, February 21, 2008 by: donnot
Σ in active addiction, i used self-pity as a survival mechanism. Σ 535 words ➥ Saturday, February 21, 2009 by: donnot
« in order to shield myself from reality, i used self-pity as a survival mechanism. » 532 words ➥ Sunday, February 21, 2010 by: donnot
‰ self-pity is one of the most destructive of defects ‰ 684 words ➥ Monday, February 21, 2011 by: donnot
ℑ self-pity or recovery ℑ 572 words ➥ Tuesday, February 21, 2012 by: donnot
♦ i will be grateful for the hope this fellowship has given me ♦ 755 words ➥ Thursday, February 21, 2013 by: donnot
τ self-pity is a tool of addiction τ 420 words ➥ Friday, February 21, 2014 by: donnot
½ when i believe that i am powerless to change ½ 608 words ➥ Saturday, February 21, 2015 by: donnot
❋ self-pity or recovery — 736 words ➥ Sunday, February 21, 2016 by: donnot
❽ cultivating my recovery ❽ 625 words ➥ Tuesday, February 21, 2017 by: donnot
🌟 an alternative 🌟 625 words ➥ Wednesday, February 21, 2018 by: donnot
😭 cultivating self-pity 😰 522 words ➥ Thursday, February 21, 2019 by: donnot
🌀 choosing to be 🌀 503 words ➥ Friday, February 21, 2020 by: donnot
👈 blaming someone 👉 505 words ➥ Monday, February 21, 2022 by: donnot
😭 self-pity, 😭 516 words ➥ Tuesday, February 21, 2023 by: donnot
🙏 FAITH 🙏 420 words ➥ Wednesday, February 21, 2024 by: donnot
☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 2
2) Therefore (to guard against this), the sage keeps the left-hand
portion of the record of the engagement, and does not insist on the
(speedy) fulfilment of it by the other party. (So), he who has the
attributes (of the Tao) regards (only) the conditions of the engagement,
while he who has not those attributes regards only the conditions
favourable to himself.