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my way, is an idea that i to which i am fairly attached, even after a minute clean. in service to my fellowship, i have, however, given up on the notion that i ALWAYS know best. that is certainly a great start, but when it comes to other areas in my life, i find myself clinging to the illusion that what i think should happen, needs to happen and it is my job to make sure that it does happen, no matter what the consequences may or may not be. that sort of behavior is far from stellar, but recognizing it and owning it, is certainly a step in the correct direction.
what has been going on with me, lately, as in the past few days, is a whole lot of shaking around whether or not i am going to get to go to GREECE in early August. i was in this position with a trip to Ireland fifteen months ago, COVID was starting to become a pandemic and i was planning a couple of trips. now that the DELTA variant is running rampant through those who cannot or will not get vaccinated, i am worried that things will shut-down once again. i have no control over what happens outside of my own life, BUT, i have a very strong desire to get out of town and see that part of the world. my plan is to wear a mask when i go into a public accommodation, maintain social distancing and self-quarantine the two weeks prior to flying out. i may be vaccinated but that does not mean i cannot be exposed to COVID and have a “positive” result. i will just have to take care of myself and move forward with the HOPE, that travel will not shut-down again.
in my job search? i may be getting tired of talking to recruiters and not to the actual people who might hire me, BUT, that does not mean i can just stop and let them come pounding on my door, offering me my “dream job.” i have to keep pounding the “virtual” pavement and putting myself out there. things at work are about to get very strange or even stranger and all i can do in this respect is be okay that i have a job that has given me the FREEDOM to pursue another one.
with all that going on inside of me, i can see that being a bit stressed-out and uncertain of what is going on, may actually be expected. my “group conscience” is to hold on tight to my sanity, by letting the world spina s it will. i have yet to say, when all is said and done, “boy, i am so glad i worried about that🙻 one way to release that pent-up stress, is to put on my running shoes and get some miles in. i think i will leave my phone behind this morning, as an hour detached from the rest of the world, is probably what this addict needs, just for today.

∞ DT ∞