Blog entry for:
Thu, Jun 28, 2007 10:18:25 AM
∞ service also requires that i look at myself and my motives. ∞
posted: Thu, Jun 28, 2007 10:18:25 AM
my efforts at service makes me highly visible to the fellowship.
my motives at service have at time been all about how i look, and not about carrying the message. coming to see that was a very tough thing since i can do the whole spiritual camouflage gig so well. these days i check my motive with someone i trust before i take a new service position. life is like that, i am still not good about checking my motives. denial, and character defects disguise my true motives from me. so pondering my motives is usually an exercise in futility.
the whole thing about being highly visible to my fellowship does create a dichotomy within me. one part of me craves the attention and enjoys being in the spotlight. another part of me, cringes when i think that my behavior and words are being used as an object lesson for those with whom i share my service life. such is the life of recovery, as i get better my motives clarify and i am less apt to do something that i will regret or have to make amends for later. i am not quite there yet, but as long as i am active in my recovery, i will approach that ideal.
so back to face the world and see what i can accomplish today.
my motives at service have at time been all about how i look, and not about carrying the message. coming to see that was a very tough thing since i can do the whole spiritual camouflage gig so well. these days i check my motive with someone i trust before i take a new service position. life is like that, i am still not good about checking my motives. denial, and character defects disguise my true motives from me. so pondering my motives is usually an exercise in futility.
the whole thing about being highly visible to my fellowship does create a dichotomy within me. one part of me craves the attention and enjoys being in the spotlight. another part of me, cringes when i think that my behavior and words are being used as an object lesson for those with whom i share my service life. such is the life of recovery, as i get better my motives clarify and i am less apt to do something that i will regret or have to make amends for later. i am not quite there yet, but as long as i am active in my recovery, i will approach that ideal.
so back to face the world and see what i can accomplish today.
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
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↔ i will remember that the world will not end just because i do not get my way ↔ 275 words ➥ Wednesday, June 28, 2006 by: donnot
↔ it is often tempting to think that i know what is best for the group. ↔ 447 words ➥ Saturday, June 28, 2008 by: donnot
α it is vital to remember that the group conscience α 150 words ➥ Sunday, June 28, 2009 by: donnot
≠ my efforts at service make me highly visible to the fellowship ≠ 290 words ➥ Monday, June 28, 2010 by: donnot
¢ working with others is only the beginning of service work ¢ 825 words ➥ Tuesday, June 28, 2011 by: donnot
μ service work calls for a selfless devotion to μ 719 words ➥ Thursday, June 28, 2012 by: donnot
⊥ allowing service to be the vehicle it is intended to be — 572 words ➥ Friday, June 28, 2013 by: donnot
∀ service requires that i look at myself ∀ 594 words ➥ Saturday, June 28, 2014 by: donnot
ℜ selfless devotion ℜ 830 words ➥ Sunday, June 28, 2015 by: donnot
🌀 group conscience 🌁 394 words ➥ Tuesday, June 28, 2016 by: donnot
🌈 the world will 🍄 610 words ➥ Wednesday, June 28, 2017 by: donnot
🎏 a big fish 🎏 600 words ➥ Thursday, June 28, 2018 by: donnot
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☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 1
3) On occasions of festivity to be on the left hand is the prized
position; on occasions of mourning, the right hand. The second in
command of the army has his place on the left; the general commanding
in chief has his on the right;--his place, that is, is assigned to
him as in the rites of mourning. He who has killed multitudes of men
should weep for them with the bitterest grief; and the victor in battle
has his place (rightly) according to those rites.