Blog entry for:
Mon, Mar 19, 2007 06:34:08 AM
∞ when i simply share what has been effective in my life, ∞
posted: Mon, Mar 19, 2007 06:34:08 AM
i can be sure that my message will be helpful to others.
well what a twenty-four hours this has been! after losing my cell phone, which has become almost another limb for me, i get to blog two days in a row about sharing. yesterday about being honest about where i am when i share and not coloring my message through rose colored lenses and today about my sharing being more than good enough regardless of who and what has been shared previously in a meeting. the part of me that is my disease wants me to believe that i have nothing of value to offer, or if i share what is really going on, other members may judge me. i find that i often cave to that whisper, believing that what i am about to share is of such little consequence that i am better off not sharing at all. honestly though, it has been my experience that the only time i have nothing to share is when i engage in cross-talk, or even worse, rehearse my share over and over again in my mind, it i have polished just so. neither case is an honest from the heart sharing of my experience, strength and hope. so most of the time, i get caught in the internal chaos of arguing with myself, missing what has been shared and then beating myself up for not being present. by the time i finally let go, the meeting is over and once again i have not shared anything, and have probably missed something i needed to hear.
ah, the life of an addict in recovery, this fine whine has been building up for a time and i believe that it is only because i am where i am, that i am finally beginning to understand a bit about what goes on in the dank recesses of my mind, or perhaps not. what i am coming to think right here and now, is that what i am sharing here and what i am sharing with other addicts either in the rooms or one on one needs to match up a little better. so what i see my task of the day to be is to listen to the voice of recovery, if i attend a meeting allow GOD to speak through me, and quit worrying whether what i share is spiritual or entertaining or moving enough. simply put -- allow myself to be myself.
BTW i did find my phone this morning so the amputation was only temporary.
well what a twenty-four hours this has been! after losing my cell phone, which has become almost another limb for me, i get to blog two days in a row about sharing. yesterday about being honest about where i am when i share and not coloring my message through rose colored lenses and today about my sharing being more than good enough regardless of who and what has been shared previously in a meeting. the part of me that is my disease wants me to believe that i have nothing of value to offer, or if i share what is really going on, other members may judge me. i find that i often cave to that whisper, believing that what i am about to share is of such little consequence that i am better off not sharing at all. honestly though, it has been my experience that the only time i have nothing to share is when i engage in cross-talk, or even worse, rehearse my share over and over again in my mind, it i have polished just so. neither case is an honest from the heart sharing of my experience, strength and hope. so most of the time, i get caught in the internal chaos of arguing with myself, missing what has been shared and then beating myself up for not being present. by the time i finally let go, the meeting is over and once again i have not shared anything, and have probably missed something i needed to hear.
ah, the life of an addict in recovery, this fine whine has been building up for a time and i believe that it is only because i am where i am, that i am finally beginning to understand a bit about what goes on in the dank recesses of my mind, or perhaps not. what i am coming to think right here and now, is that what i am sharing here and what i am sharing with other addicts either in the rooms or one on one needs to match up a little better. so what i see my task of the day to be is to listen to the voice of recovery, if i attend a meeting allow GOD to speak through me, and quit worrying whether what i share is spiritual or entertaining or moving enough. simply put -- allow myself to be myself.
BTW i did find my phone this morning so the amputation was only temporary.
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
α nothing to share α 382 words ➥ Sunday, March 19, 2006 by: donnot↔ sharing is not a competitive sport. the meat of meetings is identification and experience, … 412 words ➥ Wednesday, March 19, 2008 by: donnot
μ my sharing does not have to be either fancy or funny to ring true μ 575 words ➥ Thursday, March 19, 2009 by: donnot
∏ every addict, even me, who are working an honest program ∏ 553 words ➥ Friday, March 19, 2010 by: donnot
℘ a simple, honest message of recovery from addiction rings true ℘ 578 words ➥ Saturday, March 19, 2011 by: donnot
∈ i have something valuable to share ∈ 533 words ➥ Monday, March 19, 2012 by: donnot
“ i have times when i feel that what i have to share ” 718 words ➥ Tuesday, March 19, 2013 by: donnot
˜ every addict, including me, who is working an honest program ˜ 720 words ➥ Wednesday, March 19, 2014 by: donnot
⇔ something valuable to share ⇔ 613 words ➥ Thursday, March 19, 2015 by: donnot
🙌 something valuable 🙌 794 words ➥ Saturday, March 19, 2016 by: donnot
⊈ what i had ⊉ 661 words ➥ Sunday, March 19, 2017 by: donnot
🛸 the one thing 🛠 678 words ➥ Monday, March 19, 2018 by: donnot
💬 the truth 💬 556 words ➥ Tuesday, March 19, 2019 by: donnot
🌈 something i have 🦄 411 words ➥ Thursday, March 19, 2020 by: donnot
🏅 a competitive sport 🏆 580 words ➥ Friday, March 19, 2021 by: donnot
🙂 neither fancy 🙃 442 words ➥ Saturday, March 19, 2022 by: donnot
😭 feeling connected, 😭 656 words ➥ Sunday, March 19, 2023 by: donnot
🎯 my own experience 🎯 513 words ➥ Tuesday, March 19, 2024 by: donnot
☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 2
2) It is only by this moderation that there is effected an early return
(to man's normal state). That early return is what I call the repeated
accumulation of the attributes (of the Tao). With that repeated accumulation
of those attributes, there comes the subjugation (of every obstacle
to such return). Of this subjugation we know not what shall be the
limit; and when one knows not what the limit shall be, he may be the
ruler of a state.