Blog entry for:

i need that change if i am to continue my growth toward freedom.
so a quick check-in about how i am feeling today. once more nothing went as planned right off the bat, BUT today i just accepted it and went forward with what needed to get done. do not know what is going on these days, perhaps mercury is in retrograde, or the bad guys are hammering the internet or whatever, it is what it is.
a brief digression and now into the topic, the real truth is that no matter how much i may bitch about the changes in my life, whine about what others are saying to me, or just be pissy about how my interactions with the world around me are going, i actually am quite content with the result of the change that has been brought about across the course of my recovery. although i can say that without any qualifications, accepting the process of change is the difficult part for me. and what really disturbs me some days is what those people, who’s opinion i respect tell me that i am walking around with a piece of sh*t hanging off one of my orifices. i never take criticism well, regardless of the source, and i want to lash out, defend my actions, and rationalize away my part in the whole affair. not a whole lot of room fror growth when i am already trying to cover my tracks.
but so it goes, i am willing right here and right now to accept any change that comes my way, who knows if i will be so in twenty minutes, but time will tell!

∞ DT ∞