Blog entry for:
Wed, Jun 1, 2005 05:38:35 AM
↔ meetings and me ↔
posted: Wed, Jun 1, 2005 05:38:35 AM
when i first started coming around, the last thing i wanted to do was go to these meetings the rest of my life. i was only coming here to comply with the what i needed to do to get off probation and had no desire to ever really stop using. oh sure, i knew and used the language so i sounded as if i was serious about this whole gig, but in my mind was the plan to use as soon as i could. i listened to what was being said but, i could not shut-off the derision and sarcasm as other members shared, after all this was for them and would never be for me.
well i have been here a few days and now attend meetings 3 or 4 times a week consistently. there are days when i cannot shut down my racing mind and do not hear what is being said. there are days when i am tired and am unable to hear what is being said, and there are days when i am just stubborn and will not hear what is being shared, but i still go!
am i content when i think that i have to do this the rest of my life? NO WAY, but i can attend today‘s meeting JUST FOR TODAY and go with that! do i believe that i am in the presence of spiritual giants whose every word is dripping with prosaic wisdom? NOT HARDLY, but i never know which of my fellow members will say the words i need to hear today. so all i do, is do my best to open my mind, listen with my ears, hear with my heart and practice the FAITH that something at today‘s meeting will be what i need and desire today!
∞ DT ∞
well i have been here a few days and now attend meetings 3 or 4 times a week consistently. there are days when i cannot shut down my racing mind and do not hear what is being said. there are days when i am tired and am unable to hear what is being said, and there are days when i am just stubborn and will not hear what is being shared, but i still go!
am i content when i think that i have to do this the rest of my life? NO WAY, but i can attend today‘s meeting JUST FOR TODAY and go with that! do i believe that i am in the presence of spiritual giants whose every word is dripping with prosaic wisdom? NOT HARDLY, but i never know which of my fellow members will say the words i need to hear today. so all i do, is do my best to open my mind, listen with my ears, hear with my heart and practice the FAITH that something at today‘s meeting will be what i need and desire today!
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
∞ more than my mind has arrived in meetings, my heart has arrived, too ∞ 522 words ➥ Thursday, June 1, 2006 by: donnotδ after some time, i find that more than my mind has arrived in the meeting rooms. δ 284 words ➥ Friday, June 1, 2007 by: donnot
δ very few of us arrive in this fellowship brimming with willingness. δ 286 words ➥ Sunday, June 1, 2008 by: donnot
Δ it does not matter how i came to the fellowship, it only matters that i am here. Δ 640 words ➥ Monday, June 1, 2009 by: donnot
Δ if i keep coming back to meetings … 589 words ➥ Tuesday, June 1, 2010 by: donnot
• i did not have to be clean when i got here but, after my first meeting • 689 words ➥ Wednesday, June 1, 2011 by: donnot
Δ IN THE BEGINNING: i came to meetings Δ 676 words ➥ Friday, June 1, 2012 by: donnot
¢ when i keep coming back, i start to drop my guard, ¢ 781 words ➥ Saturday, June 1, 2013 by: donnot
∗ i came to the rooms because recovery was ∗ 875 words ➥ Sunday, June 1, 2014 by: donnot
⋅ keep coming back ⋅ 734 words ➥ Monday, June 1, 2015 by: donnot
✫ i am here because ✬ 702 words ➥ Wednesday, June 1, 2016 by: donnot
🙌 it does not 🙆 947 words ➥ Thursday, June 1, 2017 by: donnot
🌝 waiting for 🌕 630 words ➥ Friday, June 1, 2018 by: donnot
🌰 the process 🌱 645 words ➥ Saturday, June 1, 2019 by: donnot
😒 brimming 😐 381 words ➥ Monday, June 1, 2020 by: donnot
🏋 it does not 💪 181 words ➥ Tuesday, June 1, 2021 by: donnot
🤯 more than 🤩 574 words ➥ Wednesday, June 1, 2022 by: donnot
🚶 consistency 🚶 468 words ➥ Thursday, June 1, 2023 by: donnot
☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 1
2) The multitude of men look satisfied and pleased; as if enjoying
a full banquet, as if mounted on a tower in spring. I alone seem listless
and still, my desires having as yet given no indication of their presence.
I am like an infant which has not yet smiled. I look dejected and
forlorn, as if I had no home to go to. The multitude of men all have
enough and to spare. I alone seem to have lost everything. My mind
is that of a stupid man; I am in a state of chaos. Ordinary men look
bright and intelligent, while I alone seem to be benighted. They look
full of discrimination, while I alone am dull and confused. I seem
to be carried about as on the sea, drifting as if I had nowhere to
rest. All men have their spheres of action, while I alone seem dull
and incapable, like a rude borderer. (Thus) I alone am different from
other men, but I value the nursing-mother (the Tao).