๐ going on ๐
Posted: Sat, Dec 22, 2018 03:27:25 PM
as best as i can, no matter what the day may bring. as i was rushing to get this down, so i could get out of the door, i once again fat-fingered my work and dropped it into the bit bucket. as a result, i had to come back later and write what i meant to write, before running off to my morning activities. be warned what once was, may not be when i come back to this.
what was on my mind this morning, is still on my mind after a breakfast with a friend and peer, a meeting and sixty-five minutes of walking briskly through the neighborhood. what i “felt” this morning has changed and now instead of having to react, which was what this was all about before all that stuff, i can respond. no i am not going to go into gory detail about what happened and what i was feeling, but as sponsor, i have been very rarely been told that a writing assignment was not appropriate.of course, moving into uncharted territory like that, i had a very strong emotional reaction and took on that criticism as a personal affront. even though i always tell the men who choose to call me their sponse, that i am far from infallible and that IF they feel the need to question anything i say or suggest they do, to do so in real time, i am not very good about inviting that sort of feedback. i chose to reply with an “OKAY” and when i got back from my home group suggest that we speak to each other to see how to move forward. i have to admit i am lazy and do not like to reinvent the wheel. this time, that character defect/trait, came back to bite me and of course i blamed the messenger because after all how could son many be so wrong. as i was walking and not thinking about anything but keeping my pulse rate up to the proper level, it came to me, what it was that i was looking for and how i need to present it at this juncture -- strip way the trappings and ask the basic questions.
anyhow, it is time to walk away and watch some football and maybe nap a little bit. i am more than worth having the rest of today off and now that i know where i am and where everyone else in my life is, i can be okay with doing just that.
what was on my mind this morning, is still on my mind after a breakfast with a friend and peer, a meeting and sixty-five minutes of walking briskly through the neighborhood. what i “felt” this morning has changed and now instead of having to react, which was what this was all about before all that stuff, i can respond. no i am not going to go into gory detail about what happened and what i was feeling, but as sponsor, i have been very rarely been told that a writing assignment was not appropriate.of course, moving into uncharted territory like that, i had a very strong emotional reaction and took on that criticism as a personal affront. even though i always tell the men who choose to call me their sponse, that i am far from infallible and that IF they feel the need to question anything i say or suggest they do, to do so in real time, i am not very good about inviting that sort of feedback. i chose to reply with an “OKAY” and when i got back from my home group suggest that we speak to each other to see how to move forward. i have to admit i am lazy and do not like to reinvent the wheel. this time, that character defect/trait, came back to bite me and of course i blamed the messenger because after all how could son many be so wrong. as i was walking and not thinking about anything but keeping my pulse rate up to the proper level, it came to me, what it was that i was looking for and how i need to present it at this juncture -- strip way the trappings and ask the basic questions.
anyhow, it is time to walk away and watch some football and maybe nap a little bit. i am more than worth having the rest of today off and now that i know where i am and where everyone else in my life is, i can be okay with doing just that.
∞ DT ∞