Blog entry for:

of my recovery, is certainly worth sharing with my peers, especially the newest of the new. so my plan this morning was to defer this exercise until after a quick walk, and i may still do so, as i am waiting for another team to respond with the credentials i have misplaced somewhere on my work computer. since i am getting nothing but radio silence from them, perhaps it is time to go do a quick walk. so after a walk and a meeting for work, i realize that my lead may be more than a bit pompous and pretentious. although i lifted it from the reading, now that i look at it again, i wonder. that being said, i will go with the flow and move on.
it is true that i am clean today, and it is true that a couple of my peers are clean today and celebrating their clean date anniversaries. putting age before beauty, as it were:

Carl K.
Forty-one (41) years clean.
i am glad you showed me the way.

Christian F.
Three (3) years clean.
i am glad you keep coming back.

i do get caught up in the details, from time to time, and the details in this case is whether or not, is the full message or am i tilting towards the mess rather than the message. what have been “hearing” lately is that i NEED to get back to meetings in my home town and i NEED to start sharing on a more regular basis. what i also have been feeling is that i need to change what i need to focus on. i may not know what a newcomer wants or needs to hear. i have not been a newcomer for quite some time and do not play the game of declaring that i am a newcomer every day. the fact is, what i see as “issues” affecting my recovery today are certainly not the issues i faced way back when. for me, today anyhow, staying clean is not a big chore, it has just become part of my life and who i am. what i am getting a sense of, is to just feel my way through to what is going on and share more often, just for today.

∞ DT ∞