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in fact, a big attraction of the program is the absence of uniformity. so what i hear this morning in this reading is about imposing my will on the group conscience process of my group and the service bodies that i have the privilege to serve on, and even those that i do not participate in. mistaking my opinion for the right thing for everyone is a mistake that i have made more than once. so i can continue an exercise in self-flagellation or move forward into something quite different and unusual, going off on a tangent.
i am in the mood to bash someone else for telling me what to do, and i might find that exercise quite rewarding in the short run, however as i think about it, perhaps it is better for my spiritual connection to just let go any perceived issue i have with a perceived authority figure. and after all, for me, it seems to be all about perception these days. it is a mystery to me, why i find myself in a stew when someone tells me what to do, after all, my life is full of bosses, and peers. i have trouble separating the two sometimes and the all get clumped into a single category of ‘authority’. in reality neither of those groups are truly an authority figure in my life, it is my head that sets them up so i can play my mental game of bowling and knock them down like ten pins by throwing the ball of my intellect at them. not a bad analogy this cold and snowy morning and one that is particularly apt after a long service meeting yesterday. so what is it i need to do? probably the best thing is to let go of any lingering feelings i have from yesterday, take a shower, and start facing the responsibilities i have on my plate. it is after all a GOOD day to recover! and the only one who these mini-resentments is hurting is me. yes i may disagree with stuff, and yes i may sometimes even be right, but in my brief recovery experience, the conscience of the group is always the best way to grow! so maybe this was not such a tangent after all.

∞ DT ∞