Blog entry for:

...a new influence to my life, a source of fellowship and spiritual strength slowly impelling me into new, healthy patterns of living. it is also true that patiently waiting for the changes to be wrought in my life, accomplishes nothing. "but wait," i hear you say, "what do you mean when you say patiently waiting? i thought patience is a spiritual principle that you espouse quite frequently!"
and you would be correct in saying that, patience is not where the emphasis belongs in that statement, it is on the waiting part, as in passively waiting. in my experience, these changes only come about as a result of my work on my recovery. the miracle of stying clean day after day, one day at a time, only happened for me once i decided to do something like make that admission to my innermost self, that i was an addict and that as a result my life is unmanageable. the beginning of my step wo9rk was laid in that foundation, but, for me, it does not stop with that admission, that is merely the point where i could jump pff the train of the most visible symptom of the my active addiction. after that i had to do what was suggested to me, on a daily basis, including working the TWELVE STEPS, under the guidance of a member who had come before me, one of the men who have given me the honor of being sponsored by them. and i say that with a deep sense of gratitude, for those men, gave me the tools i needed to foster the personality change i needed to learn how to do this whole recovery gig!
so i actively and patiently wait for the changes to happen, and although those changes do not happen fast enough in most canes to suit my taste, nor are those change necessarily in the direction i think they should be going, i am learning how to be content with the fact that they are occurring, as i am sure the rest of the world is too! not that my influence was so evil i affected the lives of millions, but my warped personality affected enough people that just staying clean and participating in the process makes my particular corner of the world that much less chaotic. and if you subscribe to the butterfly in Brazil theory, any change in the local world is rippled through the entire world in some small manner, and who knows what the global consequences, if any will be.
so right here and right now i am content to be better than i was, and willing to do what it takes to be that much better tomorrow, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant the change. life is good today and now i have to run off to do a bit of service. TTFN

∞ DT ∞