Blog entry for:

the idea that the world was to blame for all my problems was the attitude that kept me using -- and that attitude nearly killed me. i want the world to change to suit my outlook on life, what a great concept, and if i had that mush power, well i am uncertain that the world would be a better place. it might suit my taste for about thirty seconds, but like everything else, i am sure i would tire of it and start the tweaking all over again. that is of the world to suit my vision at that second, and on and on it would go. even if i had the power just to set all the events in my life to match my desires, i am sure that the result would be the same.
the twist here, is that when i really think about it, i have a very sweet life going right now. i have no desire to use at this moment, and have not had that desire for quite some time. i have service commitments that i enjoy, most of the time, i am loved and capable of accepting the love of others, but most of all, i have direction in my life. direction towards a goal that i have no clue about, and you know what, a goal that i am really unconcerned about knowing right now. that is not to say that everything is perfect in my life, nor is that to say that there is nothing i would change given the chance, it would be nice to be wealthy so i did not have to work, but that also has its drawbacks.
ao thinking about the reading and learning to accept what comes my way, feels like a good goal for today, it is after all, what living life is all about these days.
so anyhow, it is time to accept that i have too many projects on my desk and take a few more off of my shoulders. life is good toady, and i am grateful to be just anothjer addict who chooses recovery this morning.

∞ DT ∞