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well writing this at the end of my day instead as i waited for Kathy to prepare for her day, is certainly different. as i sit here, comfortably full, enjoying cigar in the early evening i remember what the reading was all about, being bored in recovery and writing this at night is just about as far out of my routine as i can get, and i am not quite sure if i am hearing the booms of fireworks or gun fire, off in the distance. i am after all, in Sonora Mexico, for my choice is to chalk it up to spring breakers, firing odd a rocket or three.
so out of routine, well vacation is a total break in routine for me. other than the tiny bit of Twelfth Step work i got to do yesterday afternoon, my Tenth and Eleventh steps daily routine, the rest of my recovery routine, fall by the wayside. honestly when i am on vacation, i also take a meeting and sponsor and sponsee and answering my phone vacation as well. yeah, yeah, yeah i know, when i am not climbing the hill, i am sliding back towards using. i could put a great big BUT there, but that i truly the case. i am relying on what i do every day and the grace i have been given to sustain through my week of fun in the sun. honestly watching the results of alcohol ingestion, all around me, does nothing the whet my appetite, and being in a foreign country and having the desire to be home in my own bed, with my life and my recovery intact, takes care of the rest. i deserve my time off, even if it means unplugging from the fellowship and the grid itself.
anyhow, i am a the end of my ideas tonight and certainly at the end of creative thought. time to unplug from this as well and fade into the sunset of my book and see what tomorrow may bring, certainly another day to choose to be clean.