โ i watch them walk in to their first meeting defeated, their spirits broken. โ
Posted: Fri, Jan 25, 2008 10:34:54 AM
their suffering is obvious, and their desire for help even more apparent. and along those lines HAPPY ANNIVERSARY REESE F, seven years clean is a miracle, and i know you did it one day at a time.
i did not get to see Reese as a newcomer, walking into his first meeting, BUT i have had the honor of being his sponsor the last few years, and the growth that the reading speaks to this morning, is something that i got to witness as part of the journey Reese has been on. this reading is one of those "DUH" readings for me, most of the time. today, i find it a refreshing change from the reminders to be ever vigilant in my program. not that those reminders are necessarily a bad thing, i am just a bit weary of dwelling there. or perhaps it is because i have finally been released from the end of my sixth step and am processing the paradigm change that comes between steps six and seven. in the grand scheme of things it does not matter, as my journey in recovery is a journey into the unknown, and the only way i know i am making progress is the mileposts of the steps and clean date anniversaries that pop-up along the way.
yes, i have something wondrous going on inside of me, and yes i do not know what exactly will be the outcome of the changes that are percolating through my emotional and spiritual self, all i know is that today, i feel like a new person, and one who i am looking forward to getting to know again. i hated it when my sponsor said to me last night, that where i ended up made sense to him, as he thought about the work i have been doing and where i was when i first started working with him. why did i hate that statement of fact? well i had this impression that where i ended-up last night was somewhere different than i was going. quite silly of me i know, and part of that subtle yet persistent denial structure that is still inherent in me.
anyhow, i do believe i will jump in the shower and go face my day, after all, i do have a new vision to start living.
i did not get to see Reese as a newcomer, walking into his first meeting, BUT i have had the honor of being his sponsor the last few years, and the growth that the reading speaks to this morning, is something that i got to witness as part of the journey Reese has been on. this reading is one of those "DUH" readings for me, most of the time. today, i find it a refreshing change from the reminders to be ever vigilant in my program. not that those reminders are necessarily a bad thing, i am just a bit weary of dwelling there. or perhaps it is because i have finally been released from the end of my sixth step and am processing the paradigm change that comes between steps six and seven. in the grand scheme of things it does not matter, as my journey in recovery is a journey into the unknown, and the only way i know i am making progress is the mileposts of the steps and clean date anniversaries that pop-up along the way.
yes, i have something wondrous going on inside of me, and yes i do not know what exactly will be the outcome of the changes that are percolating through my emotional and spiritual self, all i know is that today, i feel like a new person, and one who i am looking forward to getting to know again. i hated it when my sponsor said to me last night, that where i ended up made sense to him, as he thought about the work i have been doing and where i was when i first started working with him. why did i hate that statement of fact? well i had this impression that where i ended-up last night was somewhere different than i was going. quite silly of me i know, and part of that subtle yet persistent denial structure that is still inherent in me.
anyhow, i do believe i will jump in the shower and go face my day, after all, i do have a new vision to start living.
∞ DT ∞