๐ i pray for ๐
Posted: Wed, Nov 12, 2025 09:38:36 AM
the addict who still suffers, and i feel for them because i too, have been there, even after i was no longer the FNG! quick disclaimer, i use the term pray very loosely, for me, that means i pause and send out the wish that every still suffering addict finds what they need to find, in whatever meeting they happen to stumble into. i know that when i got to the rooms, no matter how i tried to find something to keep me out, i could not. i choose to do my best to foster a similar reaction to those who happen to walk into my home group.
as i sat pondering how the destroy the barriers that may keep others from finding any sort of comfort in my home group, what bubbled up was not what i did or sis not feel, way back when. nor was it a ;litany of what i could have done better last Saturday at my home group. no, it was a sense of belonging and desire to bring the message of HOPE to anyone who felt like i did, way back when. in days past, that might mean i went to a meeting seeking a “project” in the form of someone who was new to recovery and basically twelve-stomping him into submission. these days, i do my proselytizing, in a quite more subtle manner, as i know i have chased more than one addict seeking recovery away from where i hang out. when i allow myself the freedom to listen and gently suggest, rather than assertively talk at someone, i get results closer to what i desire. not all of them come back, but the ones that do, might actually build the desire to have something more in their lives, than having to seek out the next thing to change the way they feel. for me, just for today, i have to recognize that i can be the barrier that blocks an addict from recovery and do my best to get out of their fucking way.
as i sat pondering how the destroy the barriers that may keep others from finding any sort of comfort in my home group, what bubbled up was not what i did or sis not feel, way back when. nor was it a ;litany of what i could have done better last Saturday at my home group. no, it was a sense of belonging and desire to bring the message of HOPE to anyone who felt like i did, way back when. in days past, that might mean i went to a meeting seeking a “project” in the form of someone who was new to recovery and basically twelve-stomping him into submission. these days, i do my proselytizing, in a quite more subtle manner, as i know i have chased more than one addict seeking recovery away from where i hang out. when i allow myself the freedom to listen and gently suggest, rather than assertively talk at someone, i get results closer to what i desire. not all of them come back, but the ones that do, might actually build the desire to have something more in their lives, than having to seek out the next thing to change the way they feel. for me, just for today, i have to recognize that i can be the barrier that blocks an addict from recovery and do my best to get out of their fucking way.
∞ DT ∞