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and like LOVE this whole relationship with GOD thingy is something about which i am clueless. it is not that i have yet to experience either of part of this metaphor, on the contrary, i am in LOVE and have learned to feel and express my LOVE since i have got clean. i also have been working on my relationship with GOD this entire time, going from a subservient, cringing and whining supplicant, to a healthier relationship across time. no one ever told me that i needed to be that groveling fool, that was just some of the stuff i had to work with when i was desperate for recovery and had no clue at all about what my concept of GOD is. i had to surrender to something and i used the only knowledge that i had to create what i needed at that time.
so why do i talk about being clueless in this relationship? well for one, i do not get daily updates as to what GOD’s will for me is today. i know that for one thing, it is for me to stay clean, just for today. i also do not know where or what i am going to be required to do, in order to maintain my recovery today. i just have to accept the fact that more will be revealed over the course of the day, and it is up to mew to surrender to that fact, accept what comes and do the best i can do, to do the next right thinbg. which happens to be getting off my computer and on my way to Grand Junction to help some other addicts fulfill our primary purpose. life is better for me today when i live in acceptance instead of struggles especially when it comes to my relationship with all things spiritual, after all i am just a material, mundane boy trying to work my way into the divine and spiritual world, and accpetence is the key, at least for me!

∞ DT ∞