๐ค solidarity is ๐ค
Posted: Sun, Jun 21, 2026 12:59:26 PM
the spiritual opposite of isolation and self-centeredness. when i came to the program, my internal dialog told me that i was in the presence of losers, the weak and feeble, and the simple minded. these folks had given up, and even said so, over and over and over again, when they spoke of surrender. i did not have a drug problem, i just loved to use/ if i did not have a drug problem how on earth could i be an addict. i used that label without conviction, convincing myself that i was lying every single time. i was just trying to fit in and look like one of the crowd. since i believed they had nothing to offer me, i offered them nothing except compliance and mouthing the words of recovery. i hung with them because it was safer to hang with those who were not using, rather than my using buddies.
this morning as i sat, i felt sense of gratitude that i no longer had to do this recovery gig by myself. today, that is especially important as i am writing out my resentments. the list has been made, the summaries written and now it is time to get through the nitty gritty, my family member resentment is next on the stack and boy oh boy is she going to get it. 🤣 seriously though from one resentment to eight is not a great leap forward and the worse part is only one of them is around events that happened after my last FIFTH STEP. that is an annoying fact of how i was, sweeping things under the carpet until they cannot be ignored. well as i have excavated my feelings and pitching away the shit they were buried under, i can see that what i thought was dealt with, needs to be dealt with now. who knows what else may pop up as this step continues.
as i prepare to ditch the house and my step writing for a few hours, i certainly know what side of my bread is buttered, as i have an appointment with my sponse on Friday, to go over my resentments. same old Don, make an appointment so i am forced to do the work. 🤭 of course, i could always feign illness or make some other lame excuse, but just for today, i will take care of what is on my plate and stop whining about it. 🤐
this morning as i sat, i felt sense of gratitude that i no longer had to do this recovery gig by myself. today, that is especially important as i am writing out my resentments. the list has been made, the summaries written and now it is time to get through the nitty gritty, my family member resentment is next on the stack and boy oh boy is she going to get it. 🤣 seriously though from one resentment to eight is not a great leap forward and the worse part is only one of them is around events that happened after my last FIFTH STEP. that is an annoying fact of how i was, sweeping things under the carpet until they cannot be ignored. well as i have excavated my feelings and pitching away the shit they were buried under, i can see that what i thought was dealt with, needs to be dealt with now. who knows what else may pop up as this step continues.
as i prepare to ditch the house and my step writing for a few hours, i certainly know what side of my bread is buttered, as i have an appointment with my sponse on Friday, to go over my resentments. same old Don, make an appointment so i am forced to do the work. 🤭 of course, i could always feign illness or make some other lame excuse, but just for today, i will take care of what is on my plate and stop whining about it. 🤐
∞ DT ∞